I've deactivated opcode66's account. Be nice. (An Essay.)

[Steve E.]

In case anyone is wondering why opcode66 has been atypically quiet around here: I think it's important that our community know that I deactivated his account. I'm still running his banner, and hopefully people who want or need his services can find him that way.

I'm not happy about the situation at all. He was a member here for almost 10 years, shy just a couple weeks of that. He holds the record for posts on the site, at 2699. A few years ago, he also contributed a bunch of money which helped keep the site afloat at the time. I don't forget these things.

The guy has a lot to contribute to the world of making records (and to other realms, as well), and I wish him very well. He is serious about his commitment to this work. I hope his significant efforts lead to excellent products and services that our members here can continue to use. Whenever he makes them available, I hope people talk about them here and can report on his successes.

In addition, I want to assert and affirm that from what I understand, services he is offering get consistently high grades. So I don't want this action to be perceived as a vote against the work that he does. Instead, this is a tragic parting of the ways, involving a guy several of us had bent over backwards to keep in this online community.

I met him in person once a few years ago, in Chicago, and we had a perfectly lovely evening chatting over beers. I've also chatted with him by phone for many hours, over this decade. We worked intensively together to determine and undermine the games of more than one egregious fraud-oriented (former) user of the site, too.

Because of all of this, I've given him a certain amount of slack for virtual social behaviors that, in retrospect, should have resulted in a serious time-out/site-vacation for him a while ago. In short, as many of you might have noticed, he had been bullying other site members and crapping in their threads. I don't believe he felt his behavior was at fault. In his perception, he was righting some perceived wrong or imbalance. I and many others did not agree, and told him to cool it, many many times. In the past, this would stop the behavior for a while. (I think? I thought?)

But my most recent warnings to him, to knock it off, were met with extreme rudeness and meanness, and a clear message that he did not plan to stop. I gave him a one-month time-out (after which, at some point, he asked to be deactivated, in a sort of "You can't fire me, I quit" manner). That time-out would have ended on November 30 --it remains in my calendar-- but the nastiness that's been forwarded to me, from ongoing posts he is making elsewhere, gives me no particular desire to engage with him directly any further. Our recent offsite conversations also culminated in some expressions of extreme ingratitude about the work I do on this site, and about the chat forum itself. Especially as I am in the middle of a stressful, time-and-energy-consuming rehearsal for a necessary site upgrade, I have no need to indulge that. Membership here is not a given or an entitlement, although perhaps I've allowed people to feel that way.

You crap in our living room, I show you the door. And that's how it went; after an absurdly long tolerance for it. For which I now apologize: I see now that it was long overdue. He seems to believe that the problems stemmed from his "speaking honestly." No. He was speaking abusively, towards and/or regarding others and myself, and most importantly, is showing evidence that he will only continue to do so.

And to be clear, and to give some credit here: I think kudos go to several people whom he was abusing, who often reacted in a restrained and lenient manner, asking merely, at most, that his more extreme negative or libelous content be removed or even just moved. Or even simply ignored his attacks (which is not actually what I wish for our members to do in the face of such abuse).

I do not want others to pile on him in this thread --please don't-- and I may close this thread out for further comments if it goes south (if I can figure out how to do so while leaving this up). You can talk with me by private message if you want, on this issue. But given his longtime presence and contributions here, I felt it was important that this event be addressed.

I wish him well. I hope the site continues to connect him with the clients who need him, even in his absence.

* * * * * * * *

Let me say it again--I expect people to be civil here. I know that it doesn't always go that way. Far too often. I also know that when incivility happens, I do not always do enough to stop it. Unfortunately, as I spend much of my site time just keeping the darn thing technically afloat, I can't be the full-time playground policeman. And, after 14+ years of running this chat forum, I am getting increasingly tired of mediating such disputes. I think I have tended to try to keep longtime users here at any cost, and I now see the folly in this. I am sorry for those who have left because this wasn't a pleasant enough place for them. Please know that if your behavior constantly results in others complaining about you, I'm just gonna kick you out of the playground.

The name of this place is a little unfortunate. When I grabbed the phrase "Lathe Trolls," in 2005, the following sense of the word "troll" was still unknown to me. Hard to believe, but true:

https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/troll#h3

"a person who intentionally antagonizes others online by posting inflammatory, irrelevant, or offensive comments or other disruptive content."

I was thinking, instead, of this definition (as, I believe, was Twig Harper, who coined the phrase):

https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/troll#h1

"A dwarf or giant in Scandinavian folklore inhabiting caves or hills."

So that's what I intend to maintain. A place where a bunch of perhaps slightly gnarly elves, holding the wisdom of the hills from ancient Vinylandia, will reveal such secrets, if given the secret password or some such offering.

I want this to be a good, safe, fun place for people to be. Even though I hate mediating such things, I DO want to know the moment someone is making trouble.

As you were.

[Radardoug]

Received and understood Steve. You are right, we should all play well together. Doesn't mean it shouldnt be a sprightly debate, but with courtesy on both sides.

[Soulbear]

Radardoug wrote

You are right, we should all play well together. Doesn't mean it shouldnt be a sprightly debate, but with courtesy on both sides.

Exactly!!! Nuff Said Soulbear

[Vice Fiori]

Looking at old (ooold) posts, i see too much things, and this things are a much more calm and nice opcode. in the pass of time I start to see more "non tolerated" posts..
I dont know what happen, but what i think is: as I look at time, people here got and write how much impressed they are when someone post their experiences, but when opcode post, people got impressed, but it´s not THAAAAT impressive. Sometimes i think this "inner angry" got in because he want to be heared better, the "lack of attention" he feel, BUT, one thing that he never pay attention, it´s about it´s not a "less impression" from people here in his work, but it´s because people know him and know how professional is his work. He dont need so much of that aplauses, because he´s a god damn good professional.
Tod had a good skills, not work fast to be sure the things going work as planned on the final project. he make work for dangerous audio, for christ sake, it´s impossible to have to many hands to give so much aplauses to this guy, he dont have ideia if people going to say good things for his knowledge, people going to die and loose their hands in too much aplauses.
I talk to him time ago, just to got a "normal" conversation, you know, he´s a man you can say "what you see it´s what you get", but this is a job that you had to know one thing: it´s a hard and self satisfied work, almost nobody going understand, under estimate and give the real credit you deserve, this is a kind of work that people going love have your vinyl, but rarelly going to scream your name. Thats why I learn to love my work, love my well done steps and scream my name for myself, even people who receive my work are really greatfull for it, they´ll not do it, only me. I learn in this work that i had to do my best to let people satisfied, and the credits and love I keep and said to myself.
I deserv the best for Tod, and one day he get out of this mess that this kind of work put in our minds.
Maybe this is my only and last post here, just to say: keep your great work, keep falling in love with your work, keep your mind in the same love you have when you start this work.